Route on 435: The Creeper Edition

Wow, I cannot believe it's June 4th already. Where did the time go? Anyway, so it's been too long since I've posted about the weirdos on the bus, so here you go. Enjoy!

I got off work early today (like 3 p.m. early!) because I finished all my projects and nobody else had more for me to do. Since I didn't drive to the P&R today, I had to get the bus that takes me closer to home. No problem, it's the normal bus. The 435. (The normal bus means business people, non-scary, non-threatening people ride the normal bus.) Well, the bus didn't leave until 3:45 p.m., so I had a lot of time to sit at the stop waiting. Not a problem, it's covered and there was a bench open.

I sit down and start texting friends (of course). This bum is standing next to me and before long another bum comes along. The bum-buddies start chatting. I listen to their conversation, interested in whatever bums talk to each other about. Well, these bums were high-drunk-smoking bums. How do I know? They were telling each other about it. "Yeah, I'm waiting for the bus," said Bum no. 1 (Really? I mean, that's why you're waiting at a bus stop. Brilliant!). "No, man, I'm going clear across to the mountains," said Bum no. 2. "I'm going to get high, you know, smoke some ___________ (I couldn't understand that part)." Then Bum no. 2 asked Bum no. 1 if he was hungry. "Yeah, of course," Bum no. 1 replied. So Bum no. 2 reached in his ginormous duffle bag and pulled out a black plastic bag. "Here, this is some salad I got," Bum no. 2 told Bum no. 1 as he gave him the bag holding the container of salad. "It's good salad." Then they did this weird side-by-side pass off thing and Bum no. 2 gave Bum no. 1 something else. I didn't want to get shot, so I didn't look hard enough (I mean, they were right next to me and I was trying to mind my own business, sort of). Well, then Bum no. 2 left and told Bum no. 1 to take care.

I stopped texting for a moment and started updating my journal. Bum no. 1 sat down. Next to me. He started talking. To me. I'm normally a friendly person, but he was creeping me out. (Why didn't I move, you ask? Because it was raining hard and I didn't want to stand until the bus came.) I surpassed my normally friendly state and ignored the bum . . . as I was writing in my journal about him. Haha, good thing he couldn't see what I was writing.

Then I hear a "pop" sound. I glanced over and saw puddles of fizzy something falling to the ground. Soon after that, I smell alcohol. Yep, Bum no. 1 opened a can of beer. Miller Genuine Draft to be exact. The weird part? He kept hiding it in his coat pocket. Yes, an open can of beer inside his coat pocket. Odd.

Anyway, just as I was getting squeamish about sitting so close to a soon-to-be-drunk bum, the bus came. I got on and hoped he wouldn't follow me. He didn't; he was too content with his beer and salad. What a day.

Randomness About: Me

Thanks to my bestie, Paulina, for the idea of blogging random information about herself . . . I'm going to copy her and add my own here. Enjoy!

1. At at whooping 5' 3", I am the tallest in my family. No joke.
   
2. I've played the piano for 15 years. Asian stereotype? Sure, why not!
   
3. Since age 14, I have babysat more than 90 kids from about 35 different families.
   
4. I hate LOTR, Harry Potter, Twilight and Jane Austen. I know, random genres and topics, but don't like any of them.
   
5. I'm half-Japanese and half-Chinese, but people often ask if I'm a) Mexican, b) Hawaiian, c) Samoan or d) Filipino.
   
6. I've never had a manicure. Just pedicures. And I love them!
   
7. I love to sew, but I always rush and end up ruining my projects.
   
8. I enjoy reality TV shows.
   
9. I've never had a retail job.
   
10. I'm extremely indecisive. It's an annoying characteristic to have.
    

There is my first attempt. I'll see how many more random things I can come up with.

Later.

Life Has A New Route

This is a really short post, simply because I'm tired and ready for bed. But in the last few weeks, I've sat next to some interesting characters on the bus. These characters include Inspector Gadget and Harry Potter. Use your imagination.

A Life on Route 435 Update

I suppose I should change the title to Life on Route 36, since that is the bus with all the weird people. Route 435 is actually mostly business people who are normal for the most part.

Anyway, today I wore a short white skirt. Bad mistake. It rained (it was supposed to be nice . . .). I took the bus to meet my grandma for lunch. On the bus to Chinatown, some weird Hispanic/Mexican/Spanish/Latino guy sat next to me since the bus was crowded and it was the only seat open. No problem with me, but he was sitting really close to me. After a few people got off the bus, he decided to move. At first I was excited that he moved, until I noticed that he was staring up my legs (remember I was wearing a short skirt). Yeah, disgusting pervert. Anyway, then finally more people got off and he moved to the front of the bus.

On that same bus, another dude was sitting sideways. Close to me. Very close to me. And he was whistling for a l-o-n-g time, I swear he was trying to get my attention. Then my handy cell phone came out and I started texting my friends about the ordeal. What the . . ., he was peering over my shoulder trying to read my texts!

Anyway, that was my day. Creepy men. They're my favorite. And for you who cannot sense sarcasm for anything, that was a joke.

Life on Route 435. Again.

Today was interesting. First off, it was hailing this morning so it made waiting for the bus miserable (I was wearing a skirt and it was windy and cold). I woke up a bit later than usual today, so I was putting my makeup on at the bus stop. As I was putting my eyeliner on, some super friendly lady walked up to me. "Good morning," she said. "Can I get you to read this magazine? We're trying to get people into their Bibles." I knew right away she was probably a JW, so I asked her, "What is your organization?" And sure enough she was a JW. I told her I wasn't interested and she walked away.

Nothing too much out of the ordinary in terms of the bus ride down to work. I walked on the opposite side of the sidewalk this morning so I could purposely avoid that newspaper man who is ALWAYS there on the corner of 4th and Union.

On my way to the bus stop to come home some dude was walking and he had--not kidding--5 watches in his hand. Not on his wrist, in his hand. Dangling. Like he jacked them from someone or something sketchy like that. Anyway, I was trying to avoid getting too close to him since I was paranoid that he was stealing people's watches from off their wrists (even though I don't currently wear a watch). Well then he started talking. I've gotten really good at pretending like I can't hear the person who is talking to me (it's easy to do Downtown since the street noise is so loud and there are people everywhere). "Hey, is that Chanel for her perfume you got on?" he asked. Well I don't know how he could smell anything on the street, let alone the perfume he thought I was wearing. Oh, and since I woke up late today I didn't put mine on. And for the record, I don't wear Chanel!

So today wasn't too horrific, but like most days I came home with stories to tell of the weird people I "met" while going to and from the office. Later.

More stories

Today my sister drove me to the office this morning, so I don't have any stories from the morning commute (and anyway, the riders on Route 435 are pretty normal, it's the route on the way home that is full of weird people).

But this afternoon I met Kristine and my grandma for lunch in the ID, so I took Route 36. As I got on, some dude (apparently drunk) was yelling so everyone on the bus could hear him: "My apartment, I don't know, my apartment, I don't got my apartment." Well, sorry dude, I don't know what happened to your apartment, but I don't really care.

On that same bus, something smelled horrible. Like pee. I figured it out that it wasn't the bus that smelled that way, it was someone on the bus. Once he got off it was fine (almost).

Then tonight after work, I took the Route 36 again but this time I took it to my grandparents' condo. As I was walking from the stop to their condo (about three blocks), I heard this voice. I looked around and saw nobody. Oh wait, I saw someone on his balcony. And yep, it was that man talking. To me. "Hola ¿Quieres venir aquí. Te ves tan linda," he probably said. (It was hard to hear, but I know he was talking to and about me.) Oh, and that roughly translates, "Hey, want to come over here? You look so pretty." Thanks, Google Translate! Anyway, so he kept talking as I was walking past. He was waving and blowing kisses. Not kidding.

I made it to my grandparents' safely and then Kristine and I drove home. So there is today's excerpt on my life on Route 435.

New Series: Life on Route 435

A *certain friend* of mine told me to write blog entries about my experiences on the public transportation system, so here you go. I'll try to update this series as funny, odd, random or scary things happen while I'm on way to or from the office (some entries may include things that the street bums say on my way to or from the office from the bus stop).

So far, some big burly man told me as I boarded the bus, "Hey girl, you look like Cleopatra!" What? Really? Do I really look like Cleopatra? Then if that wasn't bad enough, he tells the girl next to him, "Doesn't she remind you of Cleopatra? She does, huh?" Yeah dude, whatever!

And then, the next day a bum on the sidewalk was trying to get me to buy one of his newspaper things (you know, the small papers nobody knows about and the ones that are filled with random biased news you never knew could be classified as "news"?). I guess he thought I was too interested in my lunch (which I was), because I ignored his, "Hi!" His second attempt? "Why hello pretty lady!" OK, so maybe my outfit was cute that day, but umm . . . .

Well, that's my first entry in this series, "Life on Route 435." More to come.